Different women find different personality traits sexy about the opposite sex — and it’s not as always as straightforward as “ambition” or “funny.”
We polled ladies on the Internet to see what unusual personality traits about a man get their hearts pumping and their cheeks blushing:
1. His arrogance.
“Witty with a tinge of arrogance. I’m sorry, I know it shouldn’t be, but it’s always what attracts me!”
2. His acceptance of all our flaws.
“Anyone with a laundry list of responses to the question: “What’s your damage?” Plus, an air of general bemusement at all my so-called flaws.”
3. The way he interacts with kids.
“I like playing with kids so if I see him plop down on the floor with them and draw stick figures or play house for hours, I’m sold.”
“One time, my niece was going to spend the night with me and my boyfriend. He told me he was really excited to read her bedtime stories. At that moment I was done.”
4. His singing.
“I absolutely love a man who sings along to songs. I don’t know why, I don’t care how great he sounds or how he is off-tune he is, but seeing a guy cook breakfast in his boxers first thing in the morning while singing …. come back to bed, baby.”
5. His awkwardness.
“I like (mild) awkwardness. Not so much it’s a problem, though. But when I think about guys I’ve really, really liked, they’re all kind of awkward.”
6. His ability to call us on our bullsh*t.
“I love anyone who’s a hard sell and not easily impressed. Also, bullshit callers. Basically please frustrate me and let me get away with nothing.”
7. His weird hobbies.
“Love love LOVE when someone is almost weirdly obsessed with one very specific thing. I once dated someone who was very into octopuses and for some reason, it’s really attractive.”
8. His thriftiness.
“I like a guy that makes adult monetary decisions and is responsible and/or thrifty with money, someone that can get as excited as me about finding a good sale/discount.”
9. His love of reading.
“My husband is always reading. It’s even annoying sometimes. But I love that he loves to learn new things and challenge his ways of thinking.”
10. His contribution to the world.
“My husband’s main attraction for me (besides his sexier-than-hell self) is that he genuinely loves himself and values his contribution to the world, in a totally non-narcissistic way. He honestly doesn’t care what anyone else thinks about who he is as a human, and it’s made for a remarkable, integrity-filled life.”
11. His sarcasm.
“Sarcasm and the ability to take a joke even if it is against them and be able to joke right back.”
12. His ability to text like an adult.
“For those times when I can’t be face-to-face with someone, they must be able to communicate like an adult, using other means.”
13. His ability to chat up a stranger.
“It probably goes back to my southern roots, but I love a guy who has never met a stranger. The ability to kindly chat up people in an elevator or in line at check-out is so endearing to me.”
14. His empathy.
“Empathy for the people he comes across day-to-day (whether that be a waiter, cashier, etc). I’ve noticed guys who’ve had sort of shit jobs in the past — whether it was in high school or college — tend to tip better and are more understanding when we don’t get seated the MINUTE the hostess told us we would.”
15. His refusal to gossip.
“My man refuses to gossip. It’s the most frustrating thing on earth when I NEED to talk about people but it’s so attractive and so comforting to know that he’s not bashing me behind my back.”
16. His old-school good manners.
“Etiquette. Proper etiquette, like, how to hold a wine glass or knowing where to put what on a table and standing up when a woman both arrives and leaves a table. Old school etiquette. Love it.”
17. His ability to work a room.
“Being able to work a crowd/room without me being by his side the entire time. I hate feeling like I constantly need to entertain a guy/babysit. A guy should hold his own.”
18. His integrity.
“Oh man, integrity and grit to go along with it. Like, fiercely and fearlessly committed to his values. I get such a brain boner from that.”
19. His willingness to hang out with our family when we’re not around.
“There’s something about a man who is able to hold his own and feel comfortable with my sometimes-overwhelming family. While I was in France for 3 weeks, my boyfriend called my dad to hang out and ended spending a whole night with him and his friends playing poker without me asking and it made me see him as serious relationship material.”
Andrea Zimmerman is the editor-at-large at Yourtango. Follow her @angiecat86 on Instagram or email her at andreaz@yourtango.com.