Few things are as tortuous and confusing as trying to figure out if a guy likes you.
Is he being touchy-feely? Is he teasing and playful? What if he is but he’s just being nice? It can be frustrating for sure. But instead of pulling petals off a daisy to figure out if he likes you or likes you not, you can take an active role by learning how to spot the signs a guy likes you so you can move on to connecting with him on a deeper level.
Does he like me?
One of the biggest challenges women face in answering that question is that many men haven’t been taught to be great communicators. Because of this, they may find it difficult to tell the women they like how they really feel about them.
Whether they are in high school, college, or even their forties (or beyond!), lots of guys are more comfortable communicating their feelings through their actions alone, causing them to accidentally send mixed signals.
To help you (and the guy you’re interested in) out, I’ve compiled this list of things to watch out for when you’re wondering if a guy really likes you.
46 Signs A Guy Likes You
1. He makes and keeps eye contact.
Body language speaks volumes where words fail. If a guy likes you, he will use eye contact to convey interest. Naturally, people’s eyes wander around the room, but if it feels like he cannot tear his eyes from you, he might just be attracted to you. This is all because eye contact helps you to recall information.
A 2006 study conducted by psychologists in the UK showed that mutual gaze acts as an “arousal stimulus,” increasing our focus and us to remember more of what the other person is sharing with us.
So, if a guy is having some intense eye contact with you he wants to hear what you have to say which could very well mean he likes you.
2. He keeps your conversations going as long as he can.
If he likes you, he won’t just send you one-word answers or trite phrases that don’t really mean anything. He will talk about his day or ask about yours.
3. He Snaps, texts, FaceTimes, or DMs you first, and not just at night.
A guy who likes you will do a lot more than just hit you up at 10 PM every once in a while and actually starts the conversation, as opposed to responding when you reach out first.
If he likes you, he won’t be shy about starting the conversation, and, eventually saying something so bold.
4. He sneaks in a light, casual touch.
People touch the people they like. There is no better way to determine that a guy has romantic feelings towards you than when he looks for excuses to touch you.
He will pick lint off your jacket, gently guide you towards the door, and regularly brush your arm accidentally.
5. He looks right into the camera when you FaceTime.
Lots of guys FaceTime or video chat in an aloof, too-cool way where they look around the room or away from the camera — or they just aim the camera at their hair or a wall.
But if a guy feels more connected to or interested in you, he will usually really look into the camera and watch your face as you speak. This should be easy to notice because he will be FaceTiming you regularly.
Definitely pay attention during FaceTime calls because if it seems like you can talk about anything, and you talk until late, he’s probably really into you. This is one of the strongest signs that a guy likes you.
6. He seems to reach out every time you post a selfie.
If he texts or Snaps just after you post a selfie, even if he doesn’t mention the selfie, that means he likes what he sees and may be hoping to catch you online so you can chat.
7. He faces toward you.
Does he typically face you with his feet when he’s in the same vicinity? The direction a person’s feet are pointing in is thought to be a subconscious choice signaling what they are interested in.
If his feet are usually facing you, then it is a good chance that he is thinking of you. If he’s turned his body toward you while you’re sitting next to one another, he probably likes you. Especially if he doesn’t back up while doing it. It’s a very intimate posture.
8. He’s shy in person, even though he’s friendly online.
This is a pretty subtle sign, but if he’s super friendly and personable online but more shy or quiet when you see him IRL, he might have a crush on you.
Be warm and friendly to him and see if he relaxes a little. He may be braver with his phone in real life, but that doesn’t mean he doesn’t like you!
9. He watches all of your stories on social media.
If you consistently get a reaction from him to your stories, he’s probably got a crush on you.
10. He leans inward when talking with you.
A man will lean in towards the woman he likes and distance himself from the ones he does not like. He will angle his pelvis to face you when you are standing and lean in when you are seated.
He will open his posture toward you, even opening a knee or arm to close the circle around you. If he leans in when he talks to you, he probably has a thing for you.
11. You’re on his best friends list on Snapchat.
That means he’s talking to you more than pretty much anyone else. Either you’re super good friends or he’s into you.
12. He never leaves you on read.
If he always replies right after he reads your messages and never leaves you on read, it means you’re a top priority for him.
13. He’s always showing you something on his phone.
If he leans in to show you something on his phone, he’s giving you a great signal that he likes you and wants to be near you.
There is a closeness and intimacy that’s instantly created when a guy leans in to look at a phone with you.
14. He tries hard to look good in his snaps to you.
His snaps actually feature his full face, and he actually looks really cute rather than just making a weird face or cutting off part of his face.
15. He screenshots photos of your face.
If he wants to save a photo of you, that’s a strong sign right there!
16. He pulls you in close for selfies.
Snapping a pic together allows him to snuggle in close. If he leans in super tight, like the guy in the photo below, he’s probably really into you.
17. He wants to know everything about you… and he remembers what you tell him.
By inquiring about your personal life, he hopes to get to know you better and also create a bond between the two of you. And he will want to know about it all: your childhood, your family, your goals, and even your fears.
Furthermore, this says a lot about his intelligence. As human beings, we have many sides and shades within us that we offer to the world and he knows that. Asking questions is his way of trying to know the real you.
Especially note this sign if he stores all those little details about yourself in his mind. If he remembers that you love salted chocolate and how you take your Starbucks, he likes you. If he also remembers things like the name of your dog and where you grew up, that’s an even better sign.
18. He asks for details about your day.
Asking lots of questions about you also indicates that he is enjoying his time with you. It is an easy and stress-free way to sustain a conversation and keep the dialogue flowing. Listening to you helps him to get to know you better and allows him to show you how much you mean to him.
19. He invites you to do things where he will have the opportunity to be active and playful with you.
If you’re at the beach with him and a group of friends, he might invite you to play football or go in the water together, where he may have an opportunity to flirt physically by playfully tackling you or splashing you.
Again, a good guy who actually likes you will notice if you’re not into it and then back off and go back to just flirting or talking.
20. He asks lots of silly questions just to keep talking.
You know he doesn’t need to know your favorite Simpsons character or where you buy your sneakers, he’s just trying to keep you on the line — even if it gets a little awkward.
21. He asks you if you’re interested in anyone.
He’s trying to suss out the competition. If you like him back, consider telling him when he asks since that’s probably what he’s trying to figure out.
22. He tries to look strong for you.
A guy who likes you will do everything to impress you. He might show off his physical strength and bring up stories and anecdotes about his life that will show you how tough or strong he is.
23. He says hi to your family or friends in the background when you FaceTime.
Sure, he might just be a friendly guy. Or maybe he’d like to get to know the people around you or wants them to like him.
24. He teases you (nicely).
There’s a big difference between a guy who is lightly, sweetly teasing you and a guy who is being unkind. If he’s teasing you, he will also smile sweetly, look you in the eyes, touch you lightly and follow up his tease with something complimentary or self-deprecating.
For instance, if you meet a guy in a bar and you’re drinking a beer while other ladies are sipping wine or drinking White Claws, he might call you a lumberjack or ask if you also belch.
Big red flag if the teasing becomes malignant!
25. He will go where you go.
There’s a little test you can do to see if a guy likes you.
Move away from the group that he is in. Say you need a drink or something. Then, don’t return for a few minutes. If he likes you, he will try to catch your eye across the room or even move to be where you are.
26. He follows up a joke with something kind.
If he’s making fun of you for drinking beer instead of a more typical “girlie” drink, he will probably also follow it up with something like, “I actually think that’s really cool” or “That’s my favorite IPA, too” to show you that he’s just joking.
One reason guys do this is to get and keep your attention, but it’s also a way of showing you that he’s paying attention. He noticed you were drinking that beer, or that you wear mismatched socks, or that you sang along to a particular song on the jukebox. He’s paying attention and he wants you to know.
27. He banters with you.
The same type of guys will also try to start a playful banter with you. Playful banter, where two people tease and challenge each other back and forth while matching wits, is a staple of classic romantic films.
This form of flirting shows that he wants to grab and keep your attention, and also that he thinks you’re witty and intelligent enough to keep him interested.
28. He seems to want to take care of you in little ways.
He will go out of his way to do nice things for you, even if it’s something as small as carrying your shopping bags.
A few other little things he’ll do to show he cares: Opening the car door for you, bringing you a cup of coffee, offering you a ride home, or lending you his jacket if you get cold.
These small gestures indicate one thing: He is into you. Bagley, our relationship expert, also says that if a man sees you as more than a friend, he will often offer to pay for lunch or a coffee when you’re out together. It’s less about being an old-fashioned gentleman (though that may be part of it) and more that he wants you to feel good and do something nice for you.
29. He bumps into you lightly when you walk together.
If he nudges you or gently bumps into you a lot when you’re walking, he’s not being rude, he’s flirting. If you like him back, gently bump him back.
This is one of the key ways men flirt, and it’s a great sign.
30. He playfully grabs at something like your phone or your water bottle.
He doesn’t care what’s on your phone and doesn’t really want your water, he just wants to get your attention.
If he’s a good guy, he will watch your face to make sure you also think this is fun — if he likes you, he’ll knock it off if you seem irritated.
31. He offers to do projects or try new hobbies with you.
If he willingly helps you put together a piece of Ikea furniture, helps you move or paint a room, helps you set up your new TV, or suddenly takes up hiking, he likes you. These are big, couple-y projects that you don’t do with just any random friend.
32. He tries to predict something about you.
He may say something like, “I can totally see you becoming a teacher someday” or “I bet you’ll move to New York City after college”. He may be totally right, or he may be way off-base.
He may also tell you that he had a dream about you — and it is a completely innocent and maybe even bizarre dream (maybe you were flying a spaceship or cooking a meal of snails). The topic doesn’t matter, it’s his way of telling you that he has thought about you or wants to find a way to spend time talking with you.
It can be cute (and less annoying) if you think of it that way.
33. He brags about himself.
In some cases, even the most modest guy will become a bit of a show-off around you. If he’s the quiet type who may not usually get a lot of attention, he may feel compelled to brag about his accomplishments to impress you.
Just be careful that this isn’t all he does when you two talk, as it can be a sign he’s an emotionally unavailable man.
34. He blushes, stammers, or stumbles over words when you’re around.
Give him a chance to warm up to you, and do what you can to put him at ease, if possible.
35. He takes physical risks around you.
A guy who is attracted to you will also amp the risk factor when he is around you. It is not uncommon for a guy to intentionally put himself in the face of danger to catch your attention because they think women are attracted to bold and fearless males. And they are likely to deploy this strategy when an opportunity arises.
36. He tries to defend you.
Some guys might leap mindlessly to your defense, even if they have no idea what it is all about — whether it is in social situations or on social media. He wants you to see him as your knight in shining armor. Be warned, if he’s already jealous of other guys before you even start dating, this can be a major red flag.
It should be cute, not intimidating. There’s a line, and he shouldn’t cross it.
37. He opens up when it’s just the two of you (or when he feels comfortable).
Is he completely oblivious to your presence when there are other people around but cheers up the moment the two of you are alone together? No doubt, he likes you, but he is intimidated, shy, or scared.
But, this doesn’t make him any less of a potential boyfriend. He may have simply grown up with an overbearing parent/sibling/relative and simply isn’t sure what to do next with you.
38. He finds creative ways to stand out from the crowd.
Some guys may brag or do daredevil stunts to get your attention, but creative and thoughtful guys might go a little deeper to show they’re unique.
So if he’s the only guy showing up at your Scrabble competition or responding to the random post you shared on social media, he might be trying to tell you he likes you.
39. You are the focus of his attention, even when you’re with other people.
If you are in a crowd of people, a man who is smitten will give you more attention than anyone else present and spend a long time focused on you.
Nate Bagley, a fellow relationship expert, says guys will “laugh a lot, playfully, at the things she says” when they like you. So if there’s a guy in a room who seems to think you are especially funny, he might be telling you he’s into you.
40. He notices when you do something different.
Does he notice that you have changed the way you do your hair? Or that you are putting on different makeup? Wonder no more: He definitely likes you.
41. He offers to drive you or pick you up from the airport.
This is an even bigger sign if he has to drive a long distance to get you there or battle awful airport traffic to do so.
42. He asks you to hang out one-on-one, instead of in a group.
He probably knows he can get to know you better in a smaller setting, and that the opportunity for things to turn romantic is much higher when you’re alone together.
Yes, this one seems obvious, but for some reason, a guy asking a woman to hang out can sometimes seem like just a friendly invite. But if he initiates, makes a plan, and follows up — and if it’s just the two of you — it’s probably a date.
43. He gets quiet around you.
Fear of rejection is a big thing for guys, especially when they are in public. It takes a lot of boldness for a guy to put himself in a position to be publicly rejected.
So what does the guy do? He ignores you completely. Or he could ignore you when you are in the larger society, but talk to you when you are alone.
44. He tells his friends he likes you, even though he hasn’t told you.
This sounds very high school, but it happens with older guys, too — especially if they’re shy or feel you may be out of their league.
Bagley points out that this is a good way to find out if you like him back without having to take a huge risk. So definitely try to meet his friends. They might slip up and tell you everything you want to know.
45. He accidentally insults you.
He’s trying to be funny or cute, but accidentally says something mildly insulting. It happens all the time and is one of the more unexpected signs a guy likes you.
You can tell a lot about him by how he recovers from it. Does he apologize and laugh it off? How you react will help, too.
46. He literally says, “I really like you.”
Lots of guys, especially older or more mature men, will just come right out and say it!
The key to this sign is that you are receptive to it. He may not proclaim like a guy in a RomCom may, in skywriting or by holding a boombox outside your bedroom window. He will probably just slip it into the conversation. If you’re used to guys who play games and slide into your DMs randomly, this can be a shock.
You may even think he’s joking, but he probably isn’t.
So what do you do if this happens? A guy that’s this honest would love for you to return the honesty. Say, “I really like you, too!” or “Wow, I’m so glad you told me that. I am not feeling the same vibe on my end but I definitely love our friendship” or whatever is appropriate.
Either way, you have to respect the man who doesn’t make you sit and wonder!
In Summary
If he’s not advancing past the subtle signs that he likes you and you want him to, then meet him halfway.
Reciprocate by doing nice things for him, rather than trying to play it cool.
If you are not interested in the guy, do not try to take advantage of his interest in you. Let him know immediately, and you might just get yourself a wonderful friend.
Randy Skilton is an expert on relationships who believes that educating yourself on relationships with yourself and with others will greatly enhance the quality of your life.