If you want to know how to get a girlfriend, the best place to start is by knowing which personality traits women find most attractive so you can identify those you currently have, as well as what you should work on moving forward whether you’re in a relationship or not.
Knowing how to get a girl to like you relies on understanding what women want and desire most from you physically, emotionally, and mentally.
First, let’s look at the definition of attraction, which is “the action or power of evoking interest in or liking for someone or something.”
So many people see dating and relationships as a game, but try thinking of it on a more personal level.
Everything in life is based on desire, need, and pleasure. If something appears to fulfil one of those criteria, we are attracted to it.
For example, when you’re out shopping for clothes of a specific style, color, or brand, it’s because you saw a look somewhere, perhaps on someone else or in a magazine. You are attracted to it something about it that caught your attention, and you believe that finding it will fulfill a desire or need and bring you pleasure.
What each of us desire, need or get pleasure from is different. So while people tend to think that just because they are a “good catch” or a good person, anyone they want should be attracted to them, it doesn’t like that.
Men need to showcase their best qualities in order to attract women, and the same goes for women in return. Doing this takes time and requires you to put yourself first.
Women love sharing an emotional connection. In order to create that, you have to be willing to show a woman who you are while retaining your sense of independence.
If you want to know how to get a girlfriend and get a girl to like you, check out these 18 dominant personality traits and characteristics that (pretty much all) women want in men.
Women typically want men who …
1. Have a busy life
This doesn’t mean being too busy to have a relationship. It means you have priorities, which shows her that even though you like her, she has to show you who she is before she becomes a top priority herself.
2. Have leadership skills
Having leadership skills means you’re decisive. You can tell her what you like and what you don’t like, which is something most woman will be attracted to. You’re not afraid to plan things with her and allow her time and opportunity to get to know you.
3. Have passion
Women find it attractive when you talk about your passions in life. Expressing your greatest desires builds desire in her as well. The fire that lights up within you screams positivity when you’re around her, and is another way of showing her you have a life outside of her.
4. Have confidence (without cockiness)
Women don’t want cocky; they want confident. It’s nice to know a man isn’t obsessed with his looks. Women tend to be sexually and mentally attracted to a man who carries himself with class and dignity. Even if you know you’re hot, your vibe should be about more than, as what makes someone truly attractive goes much deeper than the physical.
5. Have strong beliefs and opinions
Girls find it attractive when guys stand their ground in regard to their beliefs and convictions. They appreciate a man who communicates in a respectful manner because he holds himself to high standards.
When you don’t agree with something the woman in your life says or does, you should be able to communicate this to her directly. Being your own person and allows a girl to like you in ways that aren’t only shallow.
6. Have patience
Women find it attractive when you take time getting to know them rather than diving in head first right away. When you pace yourself and take things slow, it shows her you are truly interested in getting to know her. This shows her that you’re a catch because you want to make sure she is the right fit for you. She’ll know you are a man of quality because you see yourself that way.
7. Have the ability to make decisions
When it comes to planning dates, most women find it attractive when a man gives them options, then reaches a decision and takes action. This shows confidence and power. If you really want to know how to make a girl want you, show off your ability to take the lead.
8. Have a good sense of style
You have to know what you’re comfortable with, but dressing nicely for her shows that you’re willing to make an effort. Just like men, women are visual creatures. You don’t have to be the hottest guy in the world, but you do have to be put together, and your personal style should align with who you are.
9. Have a strong voice
This doesn’t mean that you have to have a deep voice, but it means that you are confident in what you say. Steer clear of phrasing like, “Well, sorry, um, like, ah…” Your voice should exude confidence.
10. Have a beard or 5 o’clock shadow
Many women love facial hair on guys, and if you can do it, try it out! It shows off your masculine side. Honestly, though, this has about a 50/50 chance of working, as it depends on what a woman is looking for, but it is good to change up your look at times.
11. Have a dog
Want to know how to make a girl fall in love with you? Get a dog she can fall in love with first. This is a slam dunk! Most girls find men with dogs attractive.
Important note: Don’t get a dog just to get a girlfriend! Get a dog because you want one and have time to take care of it. But if you typically have trouble talking to women, your pup will help you open conversations because cute animals are magnets for pretty much everyone.
12. Have interesting conversations
Talk about topics both of you find interesting and teach her about things that are new to her. When you spark conversation about something she’s interested in, she’ll start asking questions. This is a great opportunity to share your areas of interest and knowledge with her, and it will boost your emotional connection.
13. Have the ability to own your flaws
You own your flaws and know what you need to do to improve yourself. You don’t focus on your shortcomings but work towards making them better and highlight your strong points. You understand that life is eternal growth mode.
You are just trying to be the best man every second, minute, hour, month, year, and decade!
14. Have some nice socks
Okay, this sounds so silly, but women really do like this. We don’t always talk about it, but it’s a fun way to showcase your personal style, which, as I said earlier, is attractive. And people who wear crazy, colorful socks have been shown to be independent, interesting, and successful!
15. Have a good scent
Scent is the strongest sense tied to both emotion and memory. When a woman gets attached to your smell, it can help her think positively of you when you are away. And certain smells can lift her mood by raising her endorphin levels.
16. Have well cared for hands
This is important. Don’t pick your skin or nails to the bone. Doing so is a sign of instability and shaky nerves.
17. Have a sense of adventure
Take risks and seek adventure, both within life and for yourself! This doesn’t mean you have to go bungee jumping every weekend, but that you like stepping out of your comfort zone to challenge yourself. This signals strength to a woman.
18. Have respect for yourself and others
A woman observes the way you treat not just the waiter, but everyone around you. If she’s impressed with your manners, she will brag to her friends about you — guaranteed.
Apollonia Ponti is an internationally certified relationship coach who works with men to attract the woman they desire, build confidence, master their attraction skills and rebuild relationships. Find more of her expert advice by visiting her YouTube Channel, reading her Attract a Woman e-book, or booking a coaching session.
