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Home Opinions

Ugandans Will Not Die of “Flu”

Alexander Kyokwijuka by Alexander Kyokwijuka
2020/07/21
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A simple Note, to my Rwakitura

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Greetings Mr. President and I congratulate you upon picking nomination forms to run for President of Uganda on NRM!

Thank you for the fight against #COVID19. You have really done a great job to the extent that some of your ministers have picked names like “Mama Corona”, I don’t know about “Tata Corona” though. But as we continue to be vigilant about this “enemy”, allow me share what I have been thinking for a few weeks now. There is a tale my late mother once told me while we prepared dinner in our village kitchen where all of you sit around the cooking place and you watch and wait for the food as it gets ready. So I want to share the same tale, and may be it will remind the “digital Bazukulu” who never enjoyed such traditional wisdom by our parents.

Once upon a time in the very old days the cock and the hen were jungle fowl, and did not know village life at all; they lived in the jungle and were feared by all the animals, because they had large red combs on their heads that appeared hot, and they said that these combs were full of fire. Now all animals were very much afraid of fire, so the cock and the hen ruled the jungle, because they always threatened to burn whichever animal disobeyed them with their red hot comb on their heads:

One day, the old mother leopard came home and found that the fire in her kitchen had gone out, and she said to her little “son” (cub): “Run to the cock’s house and ask him to give you a few glowing bits of charcoal to make our fire.” The cub went obediently, but he found the cock and the hen both sound asleep, and he was afraid to wake them.
Mother leopard said: “Take a little dry grass and creep up softly to the cock and light the grass from his comb.” But the cub was afraid to go alone, so his mother went with him, and they crept up to the sleeping cock and hen and gently put the dry grass against their combs, but it did not light, and the grass was not even scorched, and the mother leopard put out her paw and touched them, and the combs were quite cold, although they looked red-hot.

Then she knew that the cock and hen had been telling lies all these years, and she roared with laughter and woke them up, and she said: “Now I know that you don’t tell the truth; your combs are quite cold; there is no fire in them; the animals will not fear you anymore; I am going to tell them all about it.” The cock and hen did not wait to hear what the jungle thought about it; they packed up their things and ran away to the village, and since that day they never returned to the jungle. They have always lived with men, and they like being safely shut up at night, for even now the leopards have not forgotten, and kill them if they find them out at night.

Mr. President, when this corona thing came into existence, we were all afraid after hearing how people in Europe and America were dying. You told us to all keep quiet, lock ourselves in our houses so that we can identify the enemy and attack, we all obeyed out of fear of death. You told us that we had got a few people with the virus and we knew we were finished. Businesses closed, schools closed, people lost jobs and they didn’t mind for as long as they did not die. But slowly, we have come to know the reality that this thing is actually flu, and it is not as dangerous as we have been told because Uganda enjoys a different kind of weather conditions from America, Europe and Asia.

With time, all the things you asked us not to do because we would get the virus and die, people have done them including traveling by Boda Boda, Going to bars and lodges, people have returned to their normal lives and nowadays I even see them shaking hands, hugging, congregating, and of recent your Ministers are even holding political meetings in communities, including “Mama Corona”, a number of your Ministers, to mention but a few. Keeping Physical Distance which you people keep calling “social Distance” is not practical in places like “Kikuubo” and people have been in “Kikuubo” and they have not died. The truth is that all the things you advised people not to do, they have done and nothing has happened.

I have a feeling that if you keep people under lock down, they will soon discover that you were actually scaring them over something that is too weak to cause a shut down and cripple the economy. Remember, all the promises you made including distributing free food, masks and the likes, none of them was done satisfactorily, and you know what, you have made another one, that Uganda will hold a “scientific general election”. This however is another unrealistic commitment and your people are just out there to embarrass you. They cannot tell you the truth because they benefit from this unrealistic commitments.

Mr. President, don’t wait to be like the COCK and HEN in the tale. Allow people to get back to work including Boda Bodas, Saloons, open arcades, open places of worship, allow public gatherings like weddings, allow public transport to operate at full capacity so transport fares can go back to the normal ones, otherwise, you are running this country down. People will soon discover that the Red Hot comb on your head actually doesn’t burn, and it will not be good for your legacy my Rwakitura Friend.

Until my next Note, Greetings from Kigarama!

@KyokwijukaB

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